Why Priya is a Bad Boss

Priya's cute, though.

People smarter and wordier than me have written enough about the Airtel advert featuring the boss/wife Priya.

Words like feminism, gender and patriarchal society were definitely thrown around as people outraged and wrote explosive tweets and DM’d people for retweets. 

I’ve had a tiff with feminism earlier, and it was not pretty. So I am not even going to try to fuck with what I don’t understand. I am going to fuck with what I DO understand which is how shit works in an office.  

Here’s how that ad goes.

Priya is the boss lady and she has to get a project done within a deadline, but because she’s been lazy and undisciplined, she forgets about the deadline. The bosses above her want a report but she has no report to show! 

So what’s the boss lady gonna do? She is going to shove a danda up her team’s collective ass.

Nothing to do with the blog post, but just funny
Of course, here the Danda Theory comes into play.

(Danda Theory: When the upper management shoves a danda up the middle management’s ass, the middle management take out that danda, breaks it into small dandas and shoves them in the lower management’s ass who further shove the danda up the ass of interns and interns scream and yell at the office peons [They won’t teach you this theory in any B-school])

Anyway, so Priya’s husband works as her “subordinate” and guess whose ass she chooses to shove her danda in? (disturbing image) Right, the poor husband. She calls him in her office and tells him, “Sorry, yeh to karna hi padega.” (or something similar, I don’t get paid to remember shit like that)

And BAM! This one sentence in that whole ad fucked me up.

It made me want to buy a gun and shoot the TV. 

BC, MC, TMDL
It made me want to kick a pug and yell Punjabi swearwords at kittens.

I was fucking furious when I saw that shit and there was smoke coming out of my ears!

See, once you leave aside the concepts like feminism, gender and sexism (I have no idea what they have to do with this particular ad), Priya is just a bad boss.

She literally makes her team do overtime for reasons better known to her (cuz she forgot that she had a deadline) and then she goes home to cook food while her team members drink shitty coffee and work on shit that was Priya’s responsibility.

The real kicker here is when she tries to distract her fucking husband/team member by sending him a video of the food!

The poor guy is tired, hungry and working on bad coffee and probably a shitty sandwich from office pantry and she sends him a fucking video of warm food? That’s barbaric! That’s inhumane!

But Priya has no limits.

She will not stop! No, sir!

She tells her husband/team member to leave the work and come home!

Who the fuck will do the work then?

Didn’t she just make that poor guy sit in office after everyone including Priya had left, and do work which was so fucking important just a few hours ago? Now she is telling him to come home! And by the time he gets home, whether work is done, or not done, the food will be cold!

Thanks, Priya for being a horrible boss/wife and even worse human being.

Near the end of that ad, just look at how the guy drops his phone once he is done looking at the video of the hot, delicious food.

That one second is the whole meat of the advert. 

You got hell coming for you, Priya. Hell.

The look on his face, the almost silent sigh as he turns towards the computer screen; all scream that he is going to beat the shit out of Priya when he gets home. Then he’ll eat all that food, too. I mean, the guy looks like he can throw a punch, no?

Hit me up on twitter @69fubar if you're offended by this post. I am on a break so I won't reply. haha.

Bad Behaviour on Twitter - Thoughts etc

I don't need to and I don't have to write this blog post. But, being a professional asshole there are some things that need to be documented and when no one else would take the responsibility, I will.

I am going to write this in rapid mode and there will mistakes, grammar errors and other such shit in this post, but if you've been reading my blog, you must have been used to that by now.

And this is not even a post defending my actions on twitter, as I saw some people tweeting so on my TL (I blocked those people, I don't need that kind of negativity on my page).

So, what really happened?

Tweet God Mode

I shot my mouth off on Twitter again. 

The usual. There were some people who were pissed off and some tried to get me fired from my job, but they were unsuccessful cuz I don't even have a job.

So I've got that going for me. What really happened was that I was talking to my friend on the TL, just the light banter cuz I know the friend is cool and we can tease each other. It's like sitting with friends and you're calling each other MC BC but no one minds cuz everyone knows that you don't mean that.

But, the problem with twitter is that when you're talking to Person A, Person B is also reading that conversation, and Person B doesn't know about your equation with Person A and this can lead to hilarious consequences. And if Person B hates you or doesn't like you, they're gonna milk your words to their own ends. Like it all did on Saturday. One thing lead to another and soon I was calling a fatty a fatty.  Why does it always happen to me?

A feminist in her natural habitat

So, I ended up writing some anti-women tweets, called some fat bitch a fat bitch, and made some dude wonder how a person like me could find a woman to love and marry.

Bleh.

And those people were all probably ganging up and discussing how to get my twitter account cancelled, which hasn't happened so far. I am cool with that. You can nuke a twitter account, but you can't nuke an idea.

All said and done, it's bad behaviour to barge in on people's conversations. If you've to apologize before doing so, then why're you even doing it at all? It's like saying, I am sorry for this, but I will have to stab you in the ass.

Doesn't compute. Doesn't make sense. People are so stupid.

Me getting butthurt on Twitter


Of course, I was butthurt like any veteran twitter user would be. So many tweets and so many years laters, you know what I've learned? NOTHING.

Sure, I was wrong in saying all those things to someone, but do I care if I was wrong? Will it matter in a 100 years or so? Is it my fault that people live sheltered lives and they can't take a joke on the internet? Am i wrong in calling a fat person fat? How long are we going to live politically correct lives even on the Internet. Sure, the other person can tell me to go and die under a bus and that's OKAY. Cuz, girl and fat girl at that. Let's mollycoddle everyone cuz the world outside will do the same to them. Right? WRONG.

Some women can drive, most can't


That said, everyone has the right to be butthurt and I wish there was an open twitter war where we could all just knife each other in the guts. It would improve the condition of that cesspool dramatically.

Talking of war, there is a war coming. And it is going to change everything. Choose a side or stand aside.

Anyway, here's a nice picture. 


My love for U2's POP

There are two kinds of people in the world, those who love U2 and those who've not heard of U2.

There might be a third kind of people who don't like listening to U2, but they'll soon be eradicated from this planet for having a shitty taste in music.

Now, if you were born recently, you might not know about the band, which is a horrible thing and you must educate yourself instantly. That's that about the band, but I want to talk about the album called POP. There are great U2 albums, and there is POP. There is no measure of what POP is, no comparison. Leave everything that U2 has done musically, and you can't compare it to POP. It is something else in its entirely. It feels like the band was touched by angels when they were writing and composing this album.

Back when POP was released in 1997, lot of people hated that album because U2 switched from their conventional sound to electronic loops and samples in this album, and that fact, in my mind, made it one of the greatest music compilations I have ever heard. Hell, even Bono said that he didn't like POP as much as their other works. But Bono can't be right all the time.

From the first song Discotheque to the last song Wake Up Dead Man, the band goes through a journey and takes the listener with them, too. Listening to this album opened up my mind in so many ways that it is 90% responsible for making me what I am today.

I remember I bought the cassette of POP for 90 rupees when I was in school and the first time I played it in my tape deck, the cassette reel got caught in the deck. It was so badly tangled that I had to cut it out and do some emergency surgery on it and because of that, I've missed a part of the MOFO from the album and even today when I hear that song, my mind goes through a dissonant phase for a second. That was then, I think I still have that cassette stashed somewhere, but I'd be hard pressed to find a player for that.

Now, what makes this album so great is the fact that each song is an emotional trip in its own. The music takes you through a spectrum of emotions, it makes you want to dance, it makes you want to headbang, it makes you remember that one special night, and it makes you want to break down in tears at all the beauty in the world that you'll never get to see.

The energy, the beauty, the poetry, the anguish and the anger in the album just bleeds into your soul till you can't tell Bono's angry howls from your own.

It really is a life changing experience to listen to this album and if you're still a POP virgin, you need to de-virginize your ears immediately.

That's all I have to say about this, I am gonna listen to POP for another hour or two.




Why Comments Suck

There was a long long time ago when comments were all the rage on blogs. People used to leave comments left, right and center and that's how most of the early blogs got traction and became popular.

Heck, back when Steve Novak used to blog at My Brain Hates Me (the blog is dead now) his comment threads used to go to 100s of comments in 5-10 minutes of him publishing a new post. Even I used to love getting comments when I used to write stories on this blog. Every time you got a mail that someone commented on the blog, it used to be a rush.

And that was the time when we didn't have Internet in our phones and the only way to check my email was to walk to the cybercafe and if the place was full of people, you had to wait for your turn.

This is same as your father telling you that he used to walk to school barefoot and in boiling sand.

Yeah, I've been on the internet a long time and I know this shit.

Back to the topic of comments. The problem, I feel, with comments is that no one really gives a fuck on the internet. You might be getting comments from people saying that your blog post or your work of art was the hottest shit they've seen, but you've to wonder why they're leaving that comment, what is their motivation behind that comment, is it genuine or if they're just fucking around with you.

On the rare chance a person leaves a genuine comment, how valid is their opinion? Is that opinion an informed opinion or the opinion of just another dumbfuck who will ingest everything that is thrown his/her way.

Let's look at it this way, we're living in a world where tv shows like Honey Boo Boo are getting second and third seasons and good men are dying like flies in wars fought in lands they were never even meant to step in. In our good country, movies that make absolutely no sense are doing business worth crores and there are children begging on every fucking streetlight and tourist attraction.

Why is this happening? This happens because people turn a blind eye to unpleasant things and whatever bullshit they see, they want to forget it, even if it's for three hours in a dark movie theatre or hours spent sitting in front of the television, vegetating till you fucking die of heart disease.

And these are the people leaving comments on blogs. Heck, even the lower denominator than this. These are the people liking and sharing pictures of gods and goddesses on Facebook in hope that it will bring them some amount of luck.

These are the people who have never read a single book and they're fucking proud of it.

Think of it this way, you're wearing your best dress and walking on the road and every person who passes by expresses his/her opinion on how you look and what they think about it.

Do you really want to know all this? Because the joy of 100 people saying that you look beautiful can be destroyed by one person saying that you like a pile shit that has been eaten a puked by a diseased dog. It stings, no matter how hard your skin.

Not allowing comments on your work is the biggest and best way of saying that you just don't give a fuck. You're going to create your shit and people will have to deal with it, one way or the other.

(And anyway, no one leaves comments on blogs these days. It's all just for backlinks and shit)

Summing up, a quote I just saw

"It's very important to create for the sake of creating."‏

Is Discipline Overrated?

I was never much for discipline in life. I think that shit is better left for students, people in army or people who are into organized sports, right? I am most probably wrong, but I don't care. 

Back in the job years, I had a set routine, I used to wake up at 9 or 9.15 AM, rush through a bath and then jump on my bike and ride like hell to office. It was risky, it was dangerous, I had two small accidents on way to office in all these years, and had I been riding slow, I could have avoided them. But, fuck riding slow. Bikes are made for speed and riding slow is a sin. Except when you're on a Bullet Enfield. Riding that bike slow is a way of life. 

Anyway, I'll try not to digress from now on.

My problem with a disciplined lifestyle is that most things in life are not disciplined. The sun rises in the morning, but it never rises at the same time, the rain falls, but it doesn't fall at 9.58 AM on a particular day and year. That's going into details but then, the god and devil both live in details. When something like nature that is all around is so random, then what, I ask, is the point of following a disciplined routine in life. 

Living is basically a game that we're all going to lose and when we spend so much time fucking around with rules and regulations, we don't spend that time having fun and doing things that will make an impact on the world.

By letting go the need of discipline, I don't mean that we should all just give in to the chaos of the world, all that I mean here is that we should stop taking things so seriously. 

We're all going to die, one way or the others, so what's the point in hurting yourself over something that is just simply not in your control.

There was probably a point to this blog post, but I have successfully managed to glaze over that point in the mist of words. 

I'll probably try to be coherent in the next blog post. 

Hit me up on twitter @69fubar for more bullshit.